George Washington could never tell a lie

George Washington was known to have said, "I cannot tell a lie." And that's why he admitted to chopping down the cherry tree.

This has to be true. How do we know? Because if he has never told a lie than saying he never told a lie has to be truth.

He's a tricky one, Mr. Washington. He's a very tricky one.

Happy Birthday.

Before he was an American President, he was a President of the United States of America

PROOF:

Tracks included:

• No King
• One Dollar Bill y'all
• First Term, Best Term, Only Term
• Lump
• Cross the Delaware in G

George Washington was named after Washington State

This is true. A lot of people want to point out that I'm wrong and that Washington was actually "named after the city Washington D.C." but those people are the wrongest. A few other names his parents were thinking of naming him:

• Seattle
• Tacoma
• Salmon
• Starbuck
• The Gorge at George
• The Apple Cup
• Evergreen
• Soundgarden
• Pearl Jam
• Smells Like Teen Spirit

George Washington's parents loved the Pacific NorthWest.

George Washington's B-Day is the Third Monday of February, 1732

George Washington didn't even have a birthday, but rather God granted him the ability to be born on the third monday of the month of February, and that is why we celebrate President's day not on a certain "date," because that "date" has nothing to do with George Washington... he is a transient being capable of being born whenever he damn well chooses to as long as it falls on the third Monday of the month of February.

Other people who have the same birthday rule: MLK Jr., Abraham Lincoln and Thanksgiving.